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I tried a vibrator for the first time

So I moseyed on over to the sex toy shop last Monday morning and purchased 4 vibrators.

(I have LITERALLY been waiting to write that first email line FOR YEARS. I am so proud. Thank you for allowing me this moment. Together. For us. 😂😂😂)

So, here is the thing. I’ve never tried a vibrator. I tried four for the first time.

I TOTALLY didn’t not anticipate what would happen – it totally took me by surprise.

Watch all the antics (and wisdom) here.

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I’m sexually attracted to women.

Who anyone else chooses to sleep with or love has always meant so little to me…

My best friend for years and years had always dated men…

Then she fell in love with a woman three years ago and got married to the love of her life.

I’ve mostly dated men in my life, but I have dated two women as well.

None of this is a big deal to me: people love who they love and that makes me happy.

That being said, I still receive emails on a regular basis from many of you who are concerned or ashamed of the fact that you feel attracted to someone of the same sex.

It’s hard for me to believe – and also so understandable – that many of us can still carry shame around our sexual desires, fantasies and choices based on gender.

I have created this #IAmNotAshamed series to talk about the things that many people can still carry shame around as a way to remove that shame for all of us.

So, let me offer my own deep truth:

I desire women. I have slept with women. I can find women sexually attractive.

And I am totally not only not ashamed – I am super proud of my desires and experiences.

In the video below, I will share with you my experiences and why they meant so much to me.

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How to fully love your body – Body Love Breathwork

I believe that your relationship with your body can absolutely be a love affair.

You get to fall in love with your body…

And treat her with so much beauty and celebration…

eating is like delicious love-making…

And experiencing pleasure is filled with secret delight.

When you are super connected to your body and truly love her…

So much changes.

I know from experience because I once had a very broken and sad relationship to my body…

Where I battled with food and denied myself pleasure (or any feelings at all.)

When I decided that I could no longer live that way…

It wasn’t super clear to me how to change.

I knew I wanted to love my body, but I wasn’t sure exactly how to go about it.

When I did finally put the pieces together, I discovered that, just like any relationship,

If there was a history of mistrust and pain…

Then deep work and healing was needed.

But with enough love, focus and attention…

A beautiful relationship could be restored.

I’ve found that one of the most powerful tools to restore your relationship to your body is breathwork.

Breathwork is the new yoga…

it’s cropping up everywhere as a rapid tool for personal development, spiritual awakening and even trauma healing.

So I’ve created a breathwork practice to help you fully love your body

This 10-minute guided breathwork practice will change your relationship to your body.

And allow you to fall in love with her.

(And keep increasing your love and celebration)

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3 exquisite benefits of period sex

Hi [First Name],

When I was nine, I would pray every afternoon that I would never get my period.

I was so terrified of womanhood and what it meant.

All I knew is there was something…distasteful…on the other side.

But even to my very uninformed and scared young mind, a period signified “woman.”

To bleed was to be a woman.

There is something problematic in this, in that not all women have periods and not all women bleed.

Womanhood is more vast than a period and includes trans women, post-menopausal women and other women who don’t bleed for one reason or another…

But our cultural myths often tell us that a period is synonymous with becoming a woman…

And because of this, I’ve seen over and over again that how we treat menstrual bleeding often goes hand in hand with how we treat women in our culture.

How does the mainstream treat period blood?

It’s gross – mysterious – meant to be hidden – a medical issue/problem – needs to be “sanitized” and kept clean – not incorporated into the greater cultural conversations – dirty….

Hmmmmm….sounds a lot like how we treat women and “femininity” in general.

Like there’s something wrong with you that needs to be sanitized and kept hidden.


So, changing how you relate to your own period or anyone else’s period is a FABULOUS way to change how you think about womanhood.

What if, instead of menstrual blood being gross – unsanitary – and meant to be hidden…

Blood was beautiful, natural and meant to be celebrated?

What if women were beautiful, natural and meant to be celebrated?

What if their bodies weren’t weird medical issues to be sanitized….

But temples of awe to be respected and grateful for?


All of this is to say that having sex on your period can be quite radical and empowering.

It can change the way you feel about your body and your womanhood.

Or, if you have sex with a woman who bleeds, it can change how you view her.

Or, if you don’t bleed yourself, celebrating periods and period sex can change how you view women who do bleed.

Any way you look at it – it’s liberating.

So this week, we’re talking about period sex.

Why it’s so amazing and why it needs to be celebrated.Discover 3 exquisite benefits of sex while menstruating below

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Do you see how beautiful you are?

Whenever I would see photos or videos of myself…

Or even just catch myself in the mirror…

I would get this sinking feeling…and here these harsh voices…

“You aren’t beautiful enough. You aren’t perfect enough. You aren’t…enough.”

And that tied into a fear that I wasn’t desirable or loveable…

And I’d have this sinking, terrible feeling of horror.

Ug, ug, ug.

Can you relate in any way?

The saddest thing was I wasn’t just rejecting my beauty…

But that all the unworthiness I felt because of it seeped into every area of my life.

The friends I felt I deserved.

The relationship I felt I deserved.

The money and career I felt I deserved.

Because I rejected my beauty, I rejected a core part of myself.

And my whole life suffered as a result.

How can you feel worthy if you don’t see your own beauty?

And we’ve been taught by patriarchy that beauty is only in youth and “perfection”…

And that is total BS.

Because there are plenty of young and perfect people who lack any real beauty

Because beauty really is an essence, a radiance, a core illumination that everyone has access too.

I finally started to see my own beauty in photos and film and in the mirror.

But it didn’t happen overnight, it took years of dedicated practices.

I’m going to share the ones that really made a difference for you in today’s video.

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