{Warning! This post contains sensitive topics so you may want to read it in a space where you can relax and take care of yourself!}
When I was 23 years old, I finally went to therapy for abuse I had experienced as a child.
I discovered a whole bunch of things…like how numb I was in my whole body and how I lived in a constant state of terror inside.
As I unpacked the most uncomfortable feelings…
I also started to feel a lot of sexual pain for the first time in my life.
I had this burning inside of my vagina that felt so painful it was hard to do anything.
My period cramps became excruciatingly painful.
I always knew that there was a link between the emotions of sex and sexual pain or sexual issues.
It makes sense…if you are afraid, or disgusted, or feel negative about sexuality or your body…
you’ll unconsciously clamp up inside.
Just like you curl into a little ball when you’re afraid…I see it like your vagina or womb or pelvic floor curls into a little ball to hide.
And that tension leads to pain and stagnant energy…
which leads to sexual health issues.
It’s been scientifically shown that women who feel more disgust experience more pain during sex.
I think it goes much deeper than that…the way we feel about our sexuality and our bodies…
It affects our whole sexual system.
Negative emotions around sexuality can lead to period cramps, vulvodynia, and even sexual health issues like endometriosis or fibroids.
While I respect Western medicine and always recommend checking in with a doctor and making the best possible decision for yourself…
I also think that sex negativity and violence in our culture is most definitely affecting our sexual health as women.
And this is important because if you don’t know this, you might think you’re broken.
You’re not broken.
You just live in a sex-negative society and your body can internalize that.
So, this video is about acknowledging that….and then seeing how you can start to heal.
Let’s remove the sex negativity inside and out…
and let’s let our pelvic floors, wombs, and vaginas stop having to curl into little balls to protect themselves…
and start expanding into pleasure, joy, celebration, and thriving.
I’m not saying it’s easy, but it is most definitely possible.
Love,
Layla
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